Friday 27 April 2007

Rainy Day Woman/Bob Dylan

I was looking for “Everybody Must Get Stoned” on Youtube. Am I the only person who didn’t know that the actual title is “Rainy Day Woman”?

But I digress. I really wanted to write about Gord, the drug dealer who lives across the street. I’m not sure how I feel about having a drug dealer in the neighbourhood. It’s possible that I wouldn’t care at all, as long as he went about his business quietly. After having seen Maria Full of Grace though, I’m not sure I should be so complacent about local consumption that is provided via 50+-condom feeding frenzies and orgiastic violence elsewhere. Other addictive substances – cocoa and coffee come to mind – have fair trade alternatives. Maybe some enterprising drug dealer needs to start a fair trade drug business.

But I digress again. I’m bemused by Gord’s behaviour. I would have thought that drug dealers would be disinclined to draw attention to themselves. Maybe Gord is using some sort of reverse psychology. He has 5 hound dogs that lounge in the front window and bark at everything that goes by, so the house constantly attracts attention. Cars drive up at all hours, stereos blasting, the passengers not even bothering to hide the fact that some sort of transaction is about to take place. A monster truck arrived one night and charged a snowbank in Gord’s front yard, as if it were taking part in a demolition derby . Someone descended from the cab. “Hey, you got any fuckin’ money to pay this guy with?” he yelled at his friend in the truck. Once I went over to ask Gord to turn his music down, and was met at the door by Gilligan’s Doppelganger. He seemed surprised that I was bothered by the heavy bass, even though the house was visibly shaking. He was the one who pointed this latter fact out, although he said he couldn’t, while talking to me on his front doorstep, hear anything. He argued for a bit, claiming that the sound didn’t exceed 50 decibels. I told him I didn’t have a decibel meter, but the music was bothering me. We went back and forth like that for a bit, and finally he said he would turn it down. Then he shook my hand and introduced himself, which is how I learned his name is Gord.

A few weeks ago Gord got busted. They seized drugs with a street value of close to $100,000 from his house. This doesn’t seem to have had any impact on his business. Cars still pull up, people go into the house, leave after 5 minutes.

Soon this will no longer be my problem. A neighbour came over and told me that Gord is leaving. He bought a $1500 woofer, and wants to move somewhere where he can enjoy his music without other people complaining about the noise.

10 comments:

Otter said...

Doppelganger! Now that's a new word for me.
I wonder if Gord's new neighbors will enjoy his tunes.
Nice sketch. Great tune too.

Cedar Waxwing said...

I loved this post!

(Doppleganger is one of my favorite words)

Indigo Bunting said...

Post is fabulous. But I have to point out that the actual title to this song is "Rainy Day Woman #12 and 35." (It's no wonder sometimes it's hard to know Dylan songs when their titles are mentioned. Love this one, though.)

Helen said...

Aack, that's an even more obscure title. Do you think Bob was slightly stoned when he made it up?

Susan said...

I didn't know about the title either. You were brave to complain about the music. Who knew it would do so much permanent good?

Unknown said...

I'm trying to look really busy while I kill the last 45 minutes of this day. Do you mind if I do it here?

Helen said...

Why don't you go hang out with Gord?

Deloney said...

Gord's gone? Maybe the Skipper and the Professor are running the house now. Have you thought of taking a three hour tour?

Helen said...

Ha ha. I would, but I'm afraid I might get stuck inside for 3 seasons.

Unknown said...

Love this story... just the fact that there is a drug dealer named Gord somewhere in this world make me happy (not that I'm pro-drugs, just that I love the fact that Gord the DrugDealer lives).